Three years ago, I was promoted to a Supervisor role of 20+ people, and I look to be on track for more career promotions. Unfortunately, I am very unhappy managing other people. Recently, my administrator offered me the opportunity to go back to my old role, a position I thoroughly enjoyed, but does not offer any upward mobility at this time. I feel as though it may be a career killer. I have 20 years before retirement; should I take the demotion?

Dear friend,

If you are to trust yourself and follow the path to happiness, it sounds like you already may have the answer. You say that you are very unhappy managing other people and you also make it clear that you really enjoyed your previous role. So why the hesitation to return to your old role? I have a hunch that it has something to do with the meaning you are giving to your previous position as a “career killer” and a “demotion.” 

Let’s break this down and see what bubbles up for you. You seem to believe that your previous role lacks upward mobility. My question would be - upward mobility where? In your current company or out in the world in general? The world is full of opportunities and you have 20 years ahead of you to explore them. If you are attached to upward mobility at your current company only, it will be difficult to see what else is out there. 

And this brings me to a question you didn’t ask - what is under the fear of exploring upward mobility elsewhere? I am not suggesting you should be looking for another job, only to explore why you believe your opportunities are limited. So why dear friend do you think so? Why is the abundance of opportunities elusive while their lack, a certainty? Leaving the jobs where we feel comfortable and secure can make us question ourselves and our capabilities. It can make us feel untethered. Remember, our mind’s negativity bias will pull up a long list of why you can’t before you are able to think of a single reason why you can. But, is that really true?

Truth, should you choose to follow it in this decision-making, will certainly offer a glimpse into what needs your attention and lead you to a wholesome life of deep gratification. What is the truth about the capabilities you possess as a professional in the role you love? Write them down and bask in the knowing of your contributions. Read them over and remind yourself about what you love and how much you enjoy doing what you love. Once you are able to feel the full truth of who you are as a professional, it may be a lot easier to see where the opportunities for upward mobility lay.

You indicate that returning to your previous role may be a “career killer.” Currently, you are supervising 20 people and it is a role that you do not enjoy. What if staying at a job you do not enjoy IS a career killer while returning to a role you previously enjoyed IS a career builder? Why is that? Think of the energy you bring to a task you do not enjoy. Is it creative or is it a creativity killer? Does it feel expansive or does it make you shrink? It may not be so easy to recognize but when we are not aligned with the joy in the tasks and responsibilities we handle, we show up to a job we do not enjoy only half-heartedly. So what if returning to your old role is not a demotion but a promotion? A promotion of your happiness and an alignment with opportunities that may bring you more of what you love to do rather than what you dread to do.

Happy exploring! May the truth of what you love and the truth of your capabilities in what you love guide you to a place where you feel joyful.

Sylwia, Life Coach